• 2 Posts
  • 40 Comments
Joined 2 months ago
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Cake day: November 22nd, 2025

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  • No.

    The mere thought that my life is going to end at some point makes me freeze up emotionally and physically. It exacerbates my depression to a point where I sometimes simply call in sick.

    It’s sad. There is so much beauty in this world, in our existence, in our universe and one day my body will give up because of old age or because of sickness, depriving me of it all.

    There is so much that I haven’t experienced, and it’s not relativistic. I don’t buy the BS that some people try to console me with when they say that the only reason that I value life and all it’s beauty is because it’s finite. F*ck you all. I genuinely weep at the sunrise, at the beauty in people, at the undiscovered knowledge of the universe regardless. I wish my life would never end.

    For those of you that know the Japanese animated series Naruto, I feel so much compassion for Orochimaru, even though his human experiments were vile and evil.

    My depression sometimes makes me want to stop existing to stop suffering from it, but that’s a sickness and an internal struggle and it doesn’t represent my true feelings. I don’t want to die.







  • Chances to make a change in my miserable, depressive life. It only takes one opportunity to capture, one chance to seize and decide to do things differently, but alas, I’m not there yet. Thankfully, I have multiple - nay - an unlimited amount of chances ahead.

    Materialistically speaking, off the top of my head, maybe my physical security keys (Yubico)? I have a backup key so that I don’t get locked out of my accounts in case I loose my main key, but I could manage without the backup. Jeesh, it’s hard to come up with something material that I have multiple of since I’m a minimalist and literally have like ONE plate and ONE spoon/fork/knife if you catch my drift.






    • Scheduled messages - in case you realize you want to say something but not today
    • Flashlight - let there be light
    • Lockdown mode - in case you are at a rally and for some reason don’t want to turn off the phone
    • Sensors off, developer quick setting - to turn off sensors in addition to airplane mode in order to save battery even more
    • MAC address randomization - for privacy
    • The ability to attach a USB or wireless keyboard to type longer texts