

There were stages and layers of sex testing within Olympics history, and every time they got mis-classifications they weren’t expecting.
We figured out by the 50s that a gender binary was not imperically proveable. Too many variables that varied seperate from each other and often conflicted with each other.
These kinds of things are not cut and dry, and shrinks are honestly still trying to figure out better ways to cope with grief all the time. Some folks choose to start a new relationship to get over a breakup, others like to just get all the emotion out in one go. It sounds like you’re dealing with invasive thoughts, and I’ve always found keeping myself occupied with things helps me tune them out.
You want to keep your mind off it. It’s an emotional wound, and the more you pick at it the more it’ll linger. You can come back to this when it hurts less and the situation is more distant, but focusing on yourself for now can do great things.
Exercise, Friends, Comfort. All these help you stay feeling human, and you should make sure to have these three things squared away, since they can help steady you.
Hobbies are great for occupying yourself. You focus on the project and try to just think through it. It doesn’t have to be anything crazy either. 100% a game, make a goal out of folding a certain amount of origami crafts, make a scrap book, learn a language, doodle, etc - it doesn’t really matter what it is so long as you have something to occupy you for a longer length of time.
Changes in setting can be good, too - but the right kind of routine can also help. It really depends on your preference.
And go easy on yourself. You’ll still have episodes for some time, and that’s OK.