If you’re not middle aged, pick a younger age, IDK

  • MoreFPSmorebetter@lemmy.zip
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    16 days ago

    I’m fine.

    I’ve been in and out of therapy most of my life. Therapists are useless (for me). Not once have they told me something I didn’t already know. I know why I respond to things the way I do. I know where the trauma started. I know what copeing mechanism I’ve developed and how they can effect relationships.

    Keeping a journal doesn’t help. Meditation doesn’t help. All the various other bullshit they have tried since I was a kid have been terrible.

    Medication makes my brain feel like molasses which makes me wanna step into oncoming traffic even more so than normal.

    It is what it is.

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        16 days ago

        Unlikely.

        If I didn’t have friends and family it would hurt I would have done it years ago.

        I won’t do that to all of them though. I didn’t jump off that bridge after all. So for now I just kinda pray a random accident kills me instantly. I don’t wanna be a vegetable that they have to take care of, but if a brain aneurysm or some other act of God takes me out that would be whatever.